Tag Archives: Christmas

Random After Thanksgiving Thoughts

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mr t and nancy reagan

In no particular order whatsoever.

Stewed prunes. Just because.

No Black Friday shopping. Ever.

I feel an urge to send letters to friends, but not to report every single thing that happened this past year. I’m pretty sure they don’t care. I don’t even care. I’m talking about handwritten notes that just connect us in a way that email or Facebook cannot. Share some feelings, a few stories, some good thoughts about one another – that sort of thing… and if I can’t muster the paper and pen and stamp thing, then at least a private FB message, or a personal email. It doesn’t have to be a public display. I will probably make a bunch of phone calls, too…

I can’t wait until after December 20th, so I can know that the shortest day of the year is behind us. That thought will help get me through January and February.

Around this time of year, the sadness seems sadder, the desperation seems more desperate, and the pressure to feel happy feels abnormally explosive. I really want to just cook a few nice meals and write some stories. Is that so much to ask?

I ate way too much on Thursday. Friday morning I didn’t feel well. End of story.

I saw many people jogging around my neighborhood this morning. Coincidence? I don’t think so.

When we think about tragedies around the world (or in our own backyards – there was a deadly train crash in my neighborhood this weekend…), somehow they seem more tragic at this time of year. Or at least, that’s the perception. Many of our senses are heightened right now, because there is this sort of pressure to be grateful and observant and mindful of how we want our lives to be better (those new year’s resolutions will be upon us before you know it). How would it be if we just pretended that each day was as important as the rest? How about we be as mindful of the suffering of others throughout the year as we are now? Of course, we have to focus on the good things in life, but we can also do our part to share our love and bounty with others whenever we can.

Have a look around. Someone, maybe more than a few people in your life are really having a hard time right now. Take a few moments to check in on friends. It will make you feel better, too…

I just heard a flock of geese flying overhead. It reminds me about all the animals in the world, continuing on in formation, despite the interference by humans in their lives. It’s amazing that we all get to share this planet. I’d like to be more mindful of that…

I’m pretty sure Santa is on a budget this year. Time to start extolling the virtues of homemade gifts.

I can’t help it. I LIKE having Chinese food on Christmas Eve.

Happiness is present in the smallest moments that sometimes get strung together like jeweled necklaces. I love how shiny happiness is. It’s always with me.

Christmas Thoughts

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Christmas. My Christ-leaning friends celebrated his birthday with varying degrees of piety, while many of us navigated the pervasive lure of gift giving and receiving. How could we not be pulled in, or at the very least aware of its presence? It’s sparkly, inviting – shiny new things, or quaint, hand-made, artisanal… it’s everywhere we look, on the streets, our TV’s, our computer screens, in the eyes of our kids who have such high expectations and must constantly be brought into balance with financial reality and spiritual exigencies… It’s Christmas spirit, in all its complex dimensions, rolling through town on a wave of commercialism buffeted by blankets of wet snow, and on the night after, I’m so glad to be inside, not battling the hazards of driving in such a mess.

Meanwhile, yesterday…

12/25/12
In the wee hours of the morning, I see a light on the horizon, even though it is dark outside. I feel a connection to the suffering of children who have died needlessly, families who have lost their loved ones, their homes, their jobs, their identities… and people everywhere who continue to ask themselves the question, who am I in this world?

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What rhythm does my heart seek? Do I wish to vibrate alone, or in concert with others? Do I seek agitation or compromise, challenge or resolution, peace or combat? What will it take to satisfy me?

Is it the accumulation of things? Of money, of matching sets of collected pairs and groups and duplicate, triplicate redundancies for safety’s sake? How much is enough? What will it take to protect it all? How afraid am I to lose it?

Why do I ask these questions on this day? is it religious belief, or seasonal pressure? The collective, commercial push to reckon, end of the year style, with all that has transpired lo these many days since the last quickening of the morning?

The darkening will cease, wheels will turn, groaning, grinding along the fault lines of the inevitable shift. Yes, the tide is turning… in the sky, in time… in my heart.

I enjoy being in love, even as I’m afraid to enjoy something I may lose – afraid to let myself go in the not knowing. I’ve weathered so many losses, that a profound gain would seem a welcome respite, but it’s not that simple. The passion of loving another, like the passion of creation, entails an exploration on both sides of a pendulum’s swing. Happy face, sad face. Each stretches the skin, the direction of the pull is almost inconsequential.

So I choose love. I choose passion, and brilliance. I choose to believe I’m worth it, and it’s possible, and everything I know to be true really is true. I choose to believe in universal connectivity and higher forces and controlled chaos, and that random kindnesses are actually part of a larger plan that we are powerless to control. All we can do is adjust our level of resistance.

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This simple yet deeply resonant day means so many different things to so many. Some feel insulted by the naming of it, while others feel negated by the non-naming. Through time, people have died for the right to celebrate it, while others have died for somehow denying its significance. And yet, drilled down to its essence and origin, it’s a day to celebrate the birth of someone who embodies goodness and love and caring for all living things… including ourselves…

Can we agree that there is room to celebrate this in so many ways? I come in peace. I crave calm. I look for goodness everywhere. Aren’t all of these things still possible? (I believe they are.)

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night… and much love…